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# How the “best years of my life” are quickly becoming the worst
Hi, I’m just someone from Finland, and I’m going to be 18 in a few weeks. As many of you might know, people often consider ages 18 through 24 to be the best years one could live. Where nothing bothers you, when you don’t really have anything worth stressing over, and everything is chill.. Right?
**Prologue**
There are a few things though, that I need to get off my chest before I venture towards these amazing and absolutely glorious years of my life. I’m a transexual, which means that I’m not comfortable with the body I was born with, and wish it was the opposite gender. In some cases the desire is quite faint, and some hormone pills, or even a good talk can help. For me though, it’s very important to me that I do everything I can in order to get as close to the other gender as possible. I’m not satisfied, even if a small feature of me even resembles my current gender. And it sickens me. In addition to all this, I’m even bisexual, which stirs the stew¹ even more.
Always, have I felt uncomfortable around myself, and when I was smaller I was more attracted in the girls’ parties than the boys’ parties, and I was always intrigued about barbies and the generic girls’ toys. I didn’t play with them, I actually didn’t play with pretty much any toys at all, but the toys I played with, were very gender neutral, like legos (I’ll come back to this later). I also always ended up in the boys’ group since that’s just what society wants us to do, so the others would’ve bullied me for life for being the boy who played with barbies in kindergarten.. I feel remorse though, I feel like I should’ve done it anyways, maybe so I wouldn’t even be in this situation right now.
When I was smaller, I wanted the girls’ swim suits instead of the boys’, I often felt “girly” and I even asked my brother about it, and he was confused and laughed. I said about the swimsuit thing to my grandmom, whom I went swimming with often back then, but she was very confused aswell. I finally played with some girls some time before school started and I didn’t understand some of the words and got laughed at and traumatized, which is why I really never went into the girls’ groups anymore.
---
(This is a bit off-topic, you can skip this paragraph if you want)
Back to the legos for a bit, this is what eventually led to my career. I always liked creating, designing and being creative. I was presented computing and engineering, but I didn’t understand electricity, the mechanics required and I thought the material required to build everything I wanted, and I got disappointed since I wanted to make so much, but I couldn’t, since the materials and cables and everything required would cost so much and it was so complicated and “qhbwgqkjg”. So I was playing games at this age, as I grew a bit older I started thinking, I want to make my own games. I had made some board games and lego “games” before, but now I was starting to become interested in real video games. Therefore I started to research all this, and eventually this lead to me using Game Maker, later a friend teaching me Python and that was the start of my beautiful career as an indie game developer.
---
Alas this all leads to what I am today. I’m too shy to talk about my feelings, I feel very uncomfortable in my body and since I kind of gave out clues about my inner personality to people near me, they didn’t understand them. The feeling, that I can’t live my life to the fullest, that I am not, what I feel inside makes me feel caged, trapped, jailed even. Me being very shy and quiet, even introverted, I’m not going to tell anyone, obviously. I can’t. Very few people around me actually know how I feel, and the thought of telling my parents or my brother makes me scared stiff. I have actually told a doctor, but I’m not 18 yet, so they won’t let me into any kind of treatment without my parents knowing, not even the preparations for treatment.
---
**Real analytical part**
I’m starting to lose my strain of thought, so I guess it’s a good idea to take another start, this time more so from the medical and real standpoint. I admit, I was, for a long time, grossed out by girls and girl bacteria and such, but I feel like it’s because the society told me there were girl bacteria in the first place;
**Stage 1, Denial and Anger**
When asked by a friend once if I would’ve wanted to been born as a girl, I didn’t answer no immediately though, I thought for a second, but when he asked again, I said no. Did I really mean “no”, though? After that, I’ve been asking myself myself every day. Literally, every single day. Would I have rather wanted to be born as a girl? Once in upper elementary school I started thinking if something was wrong with me, since I was constantly thinking about it. This is when I started actually realizing that I really wanted to be a girl instead. But I didn’t accept it, being a stubborn little child, I tried blocking all these feeling away and hid it from myself. This was stage one, denial and anger. This was when I was ages 13 through maybe 15.
**Stage 2, Bargaining and Depression**
I then later, towards the end of upper elementary school, started to realize there was nothing to do about it, so I fell into depression. Not too hard yet, this stage didn’t fully start until high school or so. When it started though, it hit me good. This stage hasn’t even completely ended for me and the depression hits me very hard some days. When it hits, I often feel like even if I go through all these processes, nothing matters, since I’m not really a girl after them, or something like that. Sometimes it gets really bad. Like, really bad. So bad, that I don’t want to be a boy, but I’ll never be a girl, and it always leads me even to the edge of thinking that suicide is the only answer. I’ve never done it obviously, nor I’ve even tried it. But It’s just a feeling. I’ll come back to these thoughts later after stage 3.
**Stage 3, Acceptance**
This stage, actually, started for me only around two years ago. This is when I actually realized I was transexual and there was really nothing I could do about it, well besides hormone pills and other “repairing” operations. I’ve never really fallen off the stage two though, but I feel like I’m in stage three already, since I accept myself as trans, and I know I’m trans, but I still get often very depressed about it.
---
**Conclusions**
So as I mentioned earlier, I haven’t gotten into medical care about this, because I don’t want anyone to know about these “hideous” and “horrifying” (or so some think) conditions I had. Now later on my dad now knows, and I feel like all this saving and waiting until I’m 18 has gone straight to the drain. Now as I’m closing up to the age of 18, I’m becoming fairly old. Not old old, but you might get my point in jiffy. The fixing processes take years at best, and It’ll be a very long time from now until I’m going to be actually satisfied with my body. Now as I said in stage 2, I still get strongly depressed these days, and this is mostly why;
Remember when I told you ages 18 through 24 are the best years in human life, according to most people? Well I’m now entering this age, and not until soon, I can get actual medical attention and proper treatment. Do you know what this means? Instead of living my “best years of my life” happy and carefree, I’m going to be very depressed, sad and living in an abomination² of a body. Partially the reason I’m so introverted even, is because my body is not what i want it to be. Even if I started my fixing process right now, I’ll have to go talk to a therapist/psychiatrist or some sort, whom will determine if I’m qualified for these treatments. This’ll take about a year at worst. Now after the treatment starts, I probably start taking pills and eventually begin to resemble and/or look like my opposite gender, though my passport and pretty much everything says; “SEX: MALE”. This is a problem, a major problem. I’m going to practically have to live under a rock in order to not get beaten, because the guard in the bar line won’t let me in, because I’m a trap or something.
This, is what my life is going to be, over this “best years of my life” bullshit. Living a body I don’t want to live and getting beaten for wanting to be diffrent. I constantly get very depressed about this, and being shy and introverted, I can’t make myself tell anyone. I just come here, to the realm of the internet and cry myself out, since this is the only place that I can really share my feelings without having to socialize. Does this sound like they would be the best years of your life? I didn’t think so.
Even in this ~1600 word blog post i didn’t get all my feelings and thoughts about this subject out, but I hope this definitely evokes some feelings among you readers.
Footnotes:
1. Stirring the stew is a finnish saying, which means making something, which is already confusing or in some way odd, even more so.
2. Not in literal sense, but the body is unpleasant either way, which is the point

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# The Creation
The Blog was created, but not yet quite ready, the blog still needs some ‘editing’ before given to publicity, but soon you will see it!
Today Allexit’s Magical Modpack was released to publicity ( [click here](https://blog.allex.it/allexits-magical-pack) ) and is built up from LOTS and LOTS of mods!
it will soon be updated too quite a lot of times for reasons such as it does not support custom launcher nor ‘easy installation’ yet..

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# My first meaningful post
Today was a fairly productive day as I began working on this ‘kinda small’ but fun-to-do project for a minecraft mod. The minecraft mod is called ComputerCraft and it’s just so amazing, it lets you to bring the power of lua to Minecraft and interact with the world at the same time. Anyways, I didn’t make anything too practical but I did make an program that ‘simulates an operating system’, it’s not even near ready yet but I’m going to post a video about it later today.
So it’s called the Wandoze, and it’s supposed to be a ‘text-based’ version of Windows, kinda as a joke, but it already can handle quite a lot for a PC of Minecraft. it does have profiles like Windows professional, so you have to type your username and then password to get in etc. but it also supports a VERY high permission ranks, infinite literally, I made the system so that you can add even 100s of permission ranks from never-on-computer-visitor-dude to the ruler of all time. it also has many commands to help edit the profiles from the hand of admin without having to seek for the real files. ALSO it does not only support these little technical things, it already supports games and apps, whitch it can run pretty smooth, if the game/app is well made, but it doesn’t have any API or any sort of that stuff to help making them. but just make your game / app anything you want and drag it to on of the folders so the computer can run them.
About the Modpack I was working earlier today and yesterday, it’s now changed it’s name to a better ‘more offical’ name, [Xetrox Modpack](https://allexit.wordpress.com/xetrox-pack/), I made quite a lot of information for it and a download link too, but an update is coming SOON, so you better look up to it. I also created a Wiki -page for the Modpack too, just so if people actually get interested in it, they can share their knowledge about the modpack in it, seriosuly even I don’t know much about some of the mods in it, as ironic as it sounds. Well what am I talking here here’s the link, [Xetrox pack Wiki](http://xetroxpack.wikia.com/) I too made a couple of pages for it already, I’m of course going to make more later but for starters a couple.
For now I think I’m going to take my focus more on the Wandoze -program, later I’m going to make Wandoze 2.0, whitch is practically the same but more bugfixes, a little more features and a internet support so all the usernames can be stored in one computer and remotely gotten to. After that Possibly a third Wandoze which is going to have more ‘graphical’ features, but we’ll have to see.. wait and see..
but FOR NOW really I’m really damn tired since I didn’t get any rest last night so I’m hitting the hay earlier than normal..

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# My absence
ok.. so, I’ve been faily absent from the blog for a while now, even tho it’s just begun, but I have my reasons for it.
For the first, I want to make clear that this isn’t the kinds of blogs that update like 4 times a day, I update when I get content to update. For the last days I’ve gotten a little content now, but I’ve somehow been so tired (because of school) and absent-minded that I’ve kinda forgot. So, I left to see my dad (I go see him usually every second weekend) and while there, I’m not able to access computer, so that’s why I kind of forgot about this blog. And that’s also why I haven’t had any content lately really, After going there I’ve been just lazy and playing with my friends (you can see my progress on it on http://www.Duxter.com/Allexit) and that’s not the kind of stuff I upload on this blog about.
So what I’ve been doing the few days now, I’ve started learning to use [jMonkeyEngine](http://jmonkeyengine.org/), a 3D engine for Java, I don’t make any promies nor any speculations on upcoming games on it, but I hope to see it on more use on my projects later. Also I have this “old” text-based RPG -project called “Red West”, it’s at VERY early stage, not even really playable yet, so I’m not sending a link, yet, but before I get to making that I’m going to continue with my RPG-toolkit on python, I haven’t uploaded that on git yet, but I will soon after I get it some decent features more.
On the jMonkeyEngine, I’m hoping to make a Tower Defence game as a training game, I might release it, but that’s a **huge maybe**, and I don’t think it’s going to include very good art nor much content so don’t get your hopes up. also I’m hoping to make an **VERY old** project I’ve been speculating for like 3 years now, I’ve never really began making it, ubt I hope I get to make it with jMonkeyEngine. The game is very Arcade-like and humoristic, it’s also a kind of zombie survival, you’ll see when I start making on it. Also other game I hope to make on jMonkeyEngine is an RPG game, which I’ve been speculating too for quite a while, it’s going to have pretty much everything procedurally generated, from world to creatures, from weapons to cities. I’m hoping to see much activity on that too a little later as I learn to use jMonkeyEngine a little more.

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# It’s been a long time, isn’t it?
So it’s been a pretty damn long time since my last post (about 3 months .. I think ? ), so I decided to post one now.
Yeah I admit I’ve kind of partially forgotten this blog meantime, I promised myself I will try to get something to remind me every week or so from now on to post a blog post so everything gets to be in my blog and nothing gets forgotten.
So, let’s rewind a little and think what has happened meanwhile, shall we? So Arkhados is still in the makes (see [Dnyarri’s blog](http://wlinna.wordpress.com/) for more information on Arkhados), and I’m still making heroes for it (see [my page](http://allexit.x10.mx/) for the hero designs), but the rate at whitch I’m putting new heroes on the battlefield is slowing (because making of a hero takes quite a long time and I wait until some heroes are finished before designing new ones), meanwhile I can gather some inspiration on some new ones.
So for Red West, I’m discontinuing the actual project and I’ve begun a while ago another text-based RPG game, this game is called the Solid Kingdom. So Solid Kingdom is going to be very much bigger than Red West was going to be, for first Solid Kingdom will be semi-graphical, so there is map drawn and you can adventure in it etc, very much like in Dungeon Crawl Stone Soup (the game that inspired me to start making this one). Solid Kingdom will also have Hotkey -system in it so you don’t be have to be writing everything you do. Solid Kingdom will also have multicolored terminal-output so text can be other than white and background can be other than black. Solid Kingdom will also have a very high amout of races and classes to be able to play with and is aiming at VERY high moddability. Here is a short list of races that will be implemented in Solid Kingdom;
- Human, a humanoid race that almost every other humanoid race is based on
- Dwarves, human-like smaller race witch is usually very intelligent
- Dimril, dwarf race with the tusks and regeneration of a Troll
- Imperial Elf, an elf race with a lot better protection in their nature, their skin shine a bit.
- Elf, a seperated race of Glarik
- Glarik, the original Elf race, only race to be able to smith White Steel
- Angerin., practically Angels, very much like Human but they have wings
Please note this is a very small list of the races to be implemented.
So Solid Kindom is going to be a Multiplayer (or Singleplayer) Open World turn-based RPG (kind of a hack n’ slash). Solid Kingdom is licenced with GPLv3. You can find [Solid Kingdom’s Github here](https://github.com/Allexit/Solid-Kingdom). Solid Kingdom is completely programmed in Java and for it’s multicolor output, and hotkey-system and partially for GUI an map drawing it uses [Lanterna](https://code.google.com/p/lanterna/) (a Java “terminal” library that allows all these things to be done).
Another project I’ve been working on with another friend of mine (commonly known as Firefortcut), is an Open Source handheld console that works on Raspberry Pi type-B circuit. The toughest part of it is actually (surprisingly) the shell of the console. after the future of the console is looking better I’m going to start working on a user interface for the console, and after that another game for the console (called Shadows of Karatsu, I already started working on it but not very focused on it, I will talk about it later). If the console gets enough fame and some name we can probably start making bit more of them and a good estimated price for the actual console is about 100-150€ (135-200 US$), the price gathers from the actual Pi, screen, buttons and the shell material and some tip for us. The Licence of the user interface is still in concideration weather it’s going to be completely free or what? The compressed version of the user interface most likely will be free.
As for Shadows of Karatsu, it’s going to be a pretty generig jRPG game that is going to be very LPC (Liberated Pixel Cup) styled (see http://lpc.opengameart.org/) in graphic and is going to be programmed in java, it uses [LibGDX](http://libgdx.badlogicgames.com/) for it’s 2D game engine. It’s at very early stage and isn’t even working correctly atm. so you can expect a very long time before seeing something from it (and not even pushed to github yet, sorry). There’s nothing else really to say about it else than it’s going to be published with GPLv3 licence too.

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# ‘Much’ going on
Okay so.. I haven’t posted anything here for a while and kind of forgotten (damn), so I remembered now and decided it’s time to post another of these fabulous posts. There’s ‘much’ been going on lately and I’ve had a quite projects, for example, Dnyarri, a friend of mine, is creating a BLC -like MOBA game called Arkhados, he has a [blog of his own](http://wlinna.wordpress.com/) and you can see Arkhados’ process and progress from there.
So as I said Arkhados is a BLC (Bloodline Champions) -like MOBA game, for others, who are not familiar with BLC, it’s a MOBA game where in beginning of the match players select their bloodlines to play with. When the match starts there is a ‘smallish’ map where two teams fight eachother (1v1 to 5v5) and when the other team manages to kill other players of the opposite team, they win. You require x amount of wins to win the match, it is determined in rules and options.
Arkhados is much like that but at the moment there is only 3 rounds and basically ‘nobody wins’, also there is no teams (yet) and there will be multiple gamemodes, the only one and the current is deathmatch but for an example. there will be team deathmatch etc. later on in the game. Why I’m telling this is because I (at least) see myself as one of the biggest factors in the game, like I’m creating the heroes/champions (whatever they are really) and when we get to the certain point I’ll be making most of the maps too. Of course Dnyarri has power over the heroes since he’s making the game.
I’ve also coded and put up a [website for the designs](http://allexit.x10.mx/) and there you can find all of the currently designed characters, characters that are ready for the game, characters that need polish and characters that has been declined by either me later on or Dnyarri, most likely I will not be adding any concepts of heroes there but I will be creating another page for them later. The attributions of the page are not yet added and I’m awfully sorry about it, I’ll be adding it tomorrow or the day after tomorrow, guranteed.
Also I have ‘cancelled’ the Red West project and continued with my old projects whitch can help the next textbased RPG I’m going to make, I’ll be providing links to their git repositerys too, so I’m making a textbased game-engine whitch includes everything a textbased game could need to get started. I haven’t uploaded it to git yet but I’m also making an [rpg-toolkit](https://github.com/Allexit/rpg-toolkit), it’s compactible with textbased RPG:s, 2D and 3D RPG:s, and everything else in between. It’s supposed to handle much of the basic RPG elements, such as basic vendors, normal character, weapons, inventory, equipment, buffs and spells etc. The RPG-toolkit doesn’t really have a name of it’s own, at least yet, it just is, mostly to be an ‘community’ project. Also please note that the rpg-toolkit is in a very early stage and not ready for heavy criticism, so please if you look at it, look at it in a light perspective and be free to contribute with patches and suggestions.
For the Tower Defence I was supposed to make with JMonkeyEngine is looking pretty bad, I haven’t worked on it for quite a while (QUITE) and I’m feeling I should probably start the project all over again if I wanted it to happen. There are too much flaws in it.
But mosly I’ve been slacking off and not getting any work done, althrough I’ve had pretty rough days lately, it doesn’t still explain why I haven’t done anything but played [Xonotic](http://xonotic.org/). Xonotic is pretty awesome btw, I recommen you checking it out, it’s a FOSS game created on DarkPlaces -engine, whitch is based on Quake Engine.Anyways I hope I’ll get more active now and remember to post more on this blog.

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# January update
so, I kinda forgot about the thing where I was supposed to post a post every week, but once every month is good too.. right …? Yeah I admit I screwed up, but I’ll make it up to you, I started to learn [jMonkeyEngine](http://jmonkeyengine.org) in the side of doing Solid Kingdom (still thinking another name for it), wishing I could once make a 3D game (lol).
I have this one idea I’m going to make with jME, but I’ll keep it a secret, I’ll tell you guys if it catches on, but it’s supposed to be release ready about 1.4.14 (see already why?), but it can strech up to August, since that’s when the [Summer Assembly](http://www.assembly.org/) starts. I’ll be sending the game to the game dev comp this year, hoping for some attention and just for fun.
---
Later lookback on the post;
This post is one of the draft posts I started to make in this time, but somehow got lost, I finally found one. This wa ssupposed to be posted 12.1.2014, but anyways this project I’m talking about here has been like priority #2 for quite a long time now, I haven’t forgotten it but I rather work on Solid Kingdom than this.

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# Updates updates..
So, no I didn’t forget about the blog meantime the last update I made, instead I actually posted one or two updates but I’m not really sure why, they got removed and I didn’t obviously have a backup on them. now I’m just going to cover all I’ve updated so in them and a bit more.
So looking at Solid Kingdom, my newest project (see previous post where I tell more about it), it’s went on pretty well, I DO have it on github, in fact [this](https://github.com/Allexit/Solid-Kingdom) is it’s github repositery, but I haven’t pushed updates into github for quite a long time actually, I’m very sorry about that, it might look like the project’s frozen but it’s actually running further than almost any of my projects has before. I still don’t have any real gameplay on the actual game (I’m currently working on it), but instead I’ve been working on huge things behind the scenes and I think this game is going to be so good and so much fun to make. I’m now going to try list all the things I’ve done after I stopped using github; I’ve added a layer system (easier to add messages and other things that overlap eachother). I’ve also added some kind of message box system, that’s not in real use yet but will be as soon as I get on the real gameplay. I’ve now recently added an Action/ActionHandler system, this just makes it easier for me to first work on singleplayer side of the game and later implement multiplayer, I’m not going to explain here with all the technical information on how it works, but in a nutshell, when you try to do anything it sends an action to the ActionHandler, whitch decides on what to do with it, after that it either processes the action itself or sends it to server to be processed (depends on if you’re playing multiplayer or singleplayer). I’ve also added tonnes of little things and bigger things too that I can’t quite recall at the moment
Now the reason I’ve kind of stopped using github, is because it really makes my project harder to handle for me. Git is a nice and easy version control, but I can’t use it very well, for example if I rename a file, it does not remove the old file from the repo nor rename it, just adds the renamed file as a new one. If I’m ever going to return to using Github with Solid Kingdom, I’m most likely going to make a full wipe and re-push everything. Now I’m not saying I’m stopping to use github on other projects, it works well in any other way and I’m very pleased with it, I’m just going to have to learn more how to use it and look back on it later.
On the story side of the Solid Kingdom, I haven’t really decided much, I’ve decided that I’m going to make some kind of “personal” wiki for the story and addthe story piece-by-piece there, not writing books or anything, but instead just listing out events, characters etc. from the story.
As some of you may have also noticed I always publish my working under “Smoldering Planet”, and as some of you might know, Smoldering Planet is my game-making studio. Obviously it’s not like a real company with oriented people doing stuff for me, but once in a while I might ask a friend to join me on a project, and we publish the work under the studio, and list our names in the credits. Anyways, Smoldering Planet has been going now for about 4 to 5 years, or maby even longer. Yes Smoldering Planet is VERY old, but it’s changed it’s name very many times for a number of reasons. Mostly because I just later thought the name is incredibly stupid. Smoldering Planet was first called “Lol Gamer Studios” (yes I’m serious), it was like that for about a year or so, then it changed to “Forming Time Studios” (yes, I’m not kidding). It stayed like that for about 2 years or so, when I changed to “OverCore”, I really never used the name, like it was there, but I never made a big thing about it. I don’t think I ever even made a website for it. Anyways, after that I finally changed to Smoldering Planet, I’m not very sure how long I’ve been with the name, but I think it’s been aroud a year. After all this time I’ve finally come up with a name I really like; Saltosion Entertainment or shortly just Saltosion. Yes I’m changing the name again, not very sure when, but probably as soon as I get Saltosion’s new page up and running, I allready have a logo for it too.
Looking on this blog, I really like this blog and I’m probably going to post here again in a week or two, so be prepared. I’m also hoping I’d see more visitors in this blog, not that I really like being famous or anything, but instead I’d like to share my stories with the whole world and I want everyone to know them, and maeby even help me on some situations. If you’d be so kind, tell your friends about me.

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# Renovated grand opening
Hello, so as many of you probably know, I haven’t posted in a remarkably long time. I can not answer your fervent question, weather it’s about to change or not, but I’ve decided to take a complete new angle on this blog.
Now this blog is not just for my projects and programming stuff, but it’s for pretty much anything that I think of. Imagine twitter, but longer.
I’ll now start posting again some updates about a few projects I might have etc. but along with that I’ll be posting some rantings that might be philosophical, of public opinion, or some random criticism.
Till’ we meet again, have a jolly gay day.

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# The matrix is (uncertainly) real!
So I was thinking the other day about humanity and our society. I then started thinking about the future of humanity, what kind of life would be “good life” for people in the future, and what kind of society could provide good life for everyone?
Well defining good life obviously differs for subject to subject, so general good life doesn’t exactly exist. This only means that people must be offered differing things depending on their desires, to give good life to them. A good place to start is obviously communism. In a perfect marxist communist society everyone gets equally what they need, and there is no money whatsoever. This though leads to a society where you would **need** to define a global good life, that people should live on, which wouldn’t work as intended as earlier noted, there can be no global good life. And because in communism there is no money, stuff is shared equally, people get stuff they don’t want and not enough stuff they want, so it’s not really optimal.
Now another path we could go, what if everyone has the equal amount of money, this would mean that anyone could just buy what they want, and everyone has the equal opportunity to have anything. This is a good model of a society working technically, but the greater questions come in hand, who would collect and more importantly distribute the money? Who would keep track of the money? Would money actually be necessary even in a society like this? If everyone just gets money, why would anyone do any work to get money or produce the goods to sell? So this model doesn’t quite fit for what we’re looking for either.
So let’s get really **sci-fi**, and imagine there can be a society where there are thousands of robots per every person, and they basically do everything for us, treat us, feed us and entertain us. This would be really handy, and probably a great model, but who would create the first robots? Secondly what could prevent the robots from becoming **overlords**, and _enslaving humanity_? And even thirdly could we have more efficient choices that provide good life for people with this kind of technology?
Then I started thinking, to provide to a single person anything he could desire, we should invent a true _virtual reality_, in which people can do and create whatever they desire, after the technology is sufficient enough, they wouldn’t be too expensive to create, and everyone could have their own “private reality” they live in. But hold on, we’re getting into some real matrix shit over here. Maybe the virtual reality would just be a counterpart of our reality, in where someone could just decide anything s/he wants, and it would happen (et cetera). So would that mean that everyone who lives there (exists there in general) are in the matrix? Yes. How can we tell we aren’t already in virtual reality like this? We most likely can’t. So when we invent these virtual reality machines, we end the circle, and nobody again knows, that they live in a virtual reality. This loop repeats infinitely, until someone were to realize they live in the virtual reality, and manage to actually escape it.
The only problem is, how can you really tell if you’re on the top level matrix or not?
This has been a jolly philosophical rant session. Thank you for reading. _<insert an equal communist smily here>_

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<h1>How the “best years of my life” are quickly becoming the worst</h1>
<p>Hi, I’m just someone from Finland, and I’m going to be 18 in a few weeks. As many of you might know, people often consider ages 18 through 24 to be the best years one could live. Where nothing bothers you, when you don’t really have anything worth stressing over, and everything is chill.. Right?</p>
<p><strong>Prologue</strong></p>
<p>There are a few things though, that I need to get off my chest before I venture towards these amazing and absolutely glorious years of my life. I’m a transexual, which means that I’m not comfortable with the body I was born with, and wish it was the opposite gender. In some cases the desire is quite faint, and some hormone pills, or even a good talk can help. For me though, it’s very important to me that I do everything I can in order to get as close to the other gender as possible. I’m not satisfied, even if a small feature of me even resembles my current gender. And it sickens me. In addition to all this, I’m even bisexual, which stirs the stew¹ even more.</p>
<p>Always, have I felt uncomfortable around myself, and when I was smaller I was more attracted in the girls’ parties than the boys’ parties, and I was always intrigued about barbies and the generic girls’ toys. I didn’t play with them, I actually didn’t play with pretty much any toys at all, but the toys I played with, were very gender neutral, like legos (I’ll come back to this later). I also always ended up in the boys’ group since that’s just what society wants us to do, so the others would’ve bullied me for life for being the boy who played with barbies in kindergarten.. I feel remorse though, I feel like I should’ve done it anyways, maybe so I wouldn’t even be in this situation right now.</p>
<p>When I was smaller, I wanted the girls’ swim suits instead of the boys’, I often felt “girly” and I even asked my brother about it, and he was confused and laughed. I said about the swimsuit thing to my grandmom, whom I went swimming with often back then, but she was very confused aswell. I finally played with some girls some time before school started and I didn’t understand some of the words and got laughed at and traumatized, which is why I really never went into the girls’ groups anymore.</p>
<hr>
<p>(This is a bit off-topic, you can skip this paragraph if you want)</p>
<p>Back to the legos for a bit, this is what eventually led to my career. I always liked creating, designing and being creative. I was presented computing and engineering, but I didn’t understand electricity, the mechanics required and I thought the material required to build everything I wanted, and I got disappointed since I wanted to make so much, but I couldn’t, since the materials and cables and everything required would cost so much and it was so complicated and “qhbwgqkjg”. So I was playing games at this age, as I grew a bit older I started thinking, I want to make my own games. I had made some board games and lego “games” before, but now I was starting to become interested in real video games. Therefore I started to research all this, and eventually this lead to me using Game Maker, later a friend teaching me Python and that was the start of my beautiful career as an indie game developer.</p>
<hr>
<p>Alas this all leads to what I am today. I’m too shy to talk about my feelings, I feel very uncomfortable in my body and since I kind of gave out clues about my inner personality to people near me, they didn’t understand them. The feeling, that I can’t live my life to the fullest, that I am not, what I feel inside makes me feel caged, trapped, jailed even. Me being very shy and quiet, even introverted, I’m not going to tell anyone, obviously. I can’t. Very few people around me actually know how I feel, and the thought of telling my parents or my brother makes me scared stiff. I have actually told a doctor, but I’m not 18 yet, so they won’t let me into any kind of treatment without my parents knowing, not even the preparations for treatment.</p>
<hr>
<p><strong>Real analytical part</strong></p>
<p>I’m starting to lose my strain of thought, so I guess it’s a good idea to take another start, this time more so from the medical and real standpoint. I admit, I was, for a long time, grossed out by girls and girl bacteria and such, but I feel like it’s because the society told me there were girl bacteria in the first place;</p>
<p><strong>Stage 1, Denial and Anger</strong></p>
<p>When asked by a friend once if I would’ve wanted to been born as a girl, I didn’t answer no immediately though, I thought for a second, but when he asked again, I said no. Did I really mean “no”, though? After that, I’ve been asking myself myself every day. Literally, every single day. Would I have rather wanted to be born as a girl? Once in upper elementary school I started thinking if something was wrong with me, since I was constantly thinking about it. This is when I started actually realizing that I really wanted to be a girl instead. But I didn’t accept it, being a stubborn little child, I tried blocking all these feeling away and hid it from myself. This was stage one, denial and anger. This was when I was ages 13 through maybe 15.</p>
<p><strong>Stage 2, Bargaining and Depression</strong></p>
<p>I then later, towards the end of upper elementary school, started to realize there was nothing to do about it, so I fell into depression. Not too hard yet, this stage didn’t fully start until high school or so. When it started though, it hit me good. This stage hasn’t even completely ended for me and the depression hits me very hard some days. When it hits, I often feel like even if I go through all these processes, nothing matters, since I’m not really a girl after them, or something like that. Sometimes it gets really bad. Like, really bad. So bad, that I don’t want to be a boy, but I’ll never be a girl, and it always leads me even to the edge of thinking that suicide is the only answer. I’ve never done it obviously, nor I’ve even tried it. But It’s just a feeling. I’ll come back to these thoughts later after stage 3.</p>
<p><strong>Stage 3, Acceptance</strong></p>
<p>This stage, actually, started for me only around two years ago. This is when I actually realized I was transexual and there was really nothing I could do about it, well besides hormone pills and other “repairing” operations. I’ve never really fallen off the stage two though, but I feel like I’m in stage three already, since I accept myself as trans, and I know I’m trans, but I still get often very depressed about it.</p>
<hr>
<p><strong>Conclusions</strong></p>
<p>So as I mentioned earlier, I haven’t gotten into medical care about this, because I don’t want anyone to know about these “hideous” and “horrifying” (or so some think) conditions I had. Now later on my dad now knows, and I feel like all this saving and waiting until I’m 18 has gone straight to the drain. Now as I’m closing up to the age of 18, I’m becoming fairly old. Not old old, but you might get my point in jiffy. The fixing processes take years at best, and It’ll be a very long time from now until I’m going to be actually satisfied with my body. Now as I said in stage 2, I still get strongly depressed these days, and this is mostly why;</p>
<p>Remember when I told you ages 18 through 24 are the best years in human life, according to most people? Well I’m now entering this age, and not until soon, I can get actual medical attention and proper treatment. Do you know what this means? Instead of living my “best years of my life” happy and carefree, I’m going to be very depressed, sad and living in an abomination² of a body. Partially the reason I’m so introverted even, is because my body is not what i want it to be. Even if I started my fixing process right now, I’ll have to go talk to a therapist/psychiatrist or some sort, whom will determine if I’m qualified for these treatments. This’ll take about a year at worst. Now after the treatment starts, I probably start taking pills and eventually begin to resemble and/or look like my opposite gender, though my passport and pretty much everything says; “SEX: MALE”. This is a problem, a major problem. I’m going to practically have to live under a rock in order to not get beaten, because the guard in the bar line won’t let me in, because I’m a trap or something.</p>
<p>This, is what my life is going to be, over this “best years of my life” bullshit. Living a body I don’t want to live and getting beaten for wanting to be diffrent. I constantly get very depressed about this, and being shy and introverted, I can’t make myself tell anyone. I just come here, to the realm of the internet and cry myself out, since this is the only place that I can really share my feelings without having to socialize. Does this sound like they would be the best years of your life? I didn’t think so.</p>
<p>Even in this ~1600 word blog post i didn’t get all my feelings and thoughts about this subject out, but I hope this definitely evokes some feelings among you readers.</p>
<p>Footnotes:</p>
<ol>
<li>Stirring the stew is a finnish saying, which means making something, which is already confusing or in some way odd, even more so.</li>
<li>Not in literal sense, but the body is unpleasant either way, which is the point</li>
</ol>

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<h1>The Creation</h1>
<p>The Blog was created, but not yet quite ready, the blog still needs some ‘editing’ before given to publicity, but soon you will see it!</p>
<p>Today Allexit’s Magical Modpack was released to publicity ( <a href="https://blog.allex.it/allexits-magical-pack">click here</a> ) and is built up from LOTS and LOTS of mods!
it will soon be updated too quite a lot of times for reasons such as it does not support custom launcher nor ‘easy installation’ yet..</p>

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<h1>My first meaningful post</h1>
<p>Today was a fairly productive day as I began working on this ‘kinda small’ but fun-to-do project for a minecraft mod. The minecraft mod is called ComputerCraft and it’s just so amazing, it lets you to bring the power of lua to Minecraft and interact with the world at the same time. Anyways, I didn’t make anything too practical but I did make an program that ‘simulates an operating system’, it’s not even near ready yet but I’m going to post a video about it later today.</p>
<p>So it’s called the Wandoze, and it’s supposed to be a ‘text-based’ version of Windows, kinda as a joke, but it already can handle quite a lot for a PC of Minecraft. it does have profiles like Windows professional, so you have to type your username and then password to get in etc. but it also supports a VERY high permission ranks, infinite literally, I made the system so that you can add even 100s of permission ranks from never-on-computer-visitor-dude to the ruler of all time. it also has many commands to help edit the profiles from the hand of admin without having to seek for the real files. ALSO it does not only support these little technical things, it already supports games and apps, whitch it can run pretty smooth, if the game/app is well made, but it doesn’t have any API or any sort of that stuff to help making them. but just make your game / app anything you want and drag it to on of the folders so the computer can run them.</p>
<p>About the Modpack I was working earlier today and yesterday, it’s now changed it’s name to a better ‘more offical’ name, <a href="https://allexit.wordpress.com/xetrox-pack/">Xetrox Modpack</a>, I made quite a lot of information for it and a download link too, but an update is coming SOON, so you better look up to it. I also created a Wiki -page for the Modpack too, just so if people actually get interested in it, they can share their knowledge about the modpack in it, seriosuly even I don’t know much about some of the mods in it, as ironic as it sounds. Well what am I talking here here’s the link, <a href="http://xetroxpack.wikia.com/">Xetrox pack Wiki</a> I too made a couple of pages for it already, I’m of course going to make more later but for starters a couple.</p>
<p>For now I think I’m going to take my focus more on the Wandoze -program, later I’m going to make Wandoze 2.0, whitch is practically the same but more bugfixes, a little more features and a internet support so all the usernames can be stored in one computer and remotely gotten to. After that Possibly a third Wandoze which is going to have more ‘graphical’ features, but we’ll have to see.. wait and see..</p>
<p>but FOR NOW really I’m really damn tired since I didn’t get any rest last night so I’m hitting the hay earlier than normal..</p>

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<h1>My absence</h1>
<p>ok.. so, I’ve been faily absent from the blog for a while now, even tho it’s just begun, but I have my reasons for it.</p>
<p>For the first, I want to make clear that this isn’t the kinds of blogs that update like 4 times a day, I update when I get content to update. For the last days I’ve gotten a little content now, but I’ve somehow been so tired (because of school) and absent-minded that I’ve kinda forgot. So, I left to see my dad (I go see him usually every second weekend) and while there, I’m not able to access computer, so that’s why I kind of forgot about this blog. And that’s also why I haven’t had any content lately really, After going there I’ve been just lazy and playing with my friends (you can see my progress on it on http://www.Duxter.com/Allexit) and that’s not the kind of stuff I upload on this blog about.</p>
<p>So what I’ve been doing the few days now, I’ve started learning to use <a href="http://jmonkeyengine.org/">jMonkeyEngine</a>, a 3D engine for Java, I don’t make any promies nor any speculations on upcoming games on it, but I hope to see it on more use on my projects later. Also I have this “old” text-based RPG -project called “Red West”, it’s at VERY early stage, not even really playable yet, so I’m not sending a link, yet, but before I get to making that I’m going to continue with my RPG-toolkit on python, I haven’t uploaded that on git yet, but I will soon after I get it some decent features more.</p>
<p>On the jMonkeyEngine, I’m hoping to make a Tower Defence game as a training game, I might release it, but that’s a <strong>huge maybe</strong>, and I don’t think it’s going to include very good art nor much content so don’t get your hopes up. also I’m hoping to make an <strong>VERY old</strong> project I’ve been speculating for like 3 years now, I’ve never really began making it, ubt I hope I get to make it with jMonkeyEngine. The game is very Arcade-like and humoristic, it’s also a kind of zombie survival, you’ll see when I start making on it. Also other game I hope to make on jMonkeyEngine is an RPG game, which I’ve been speculating too for quite a while, it’s going to have pretty much everything procedurally generated, from world to creatures, from weapons to cities. I’m hoping to see much activity on that too a little later as I learn to use jMonkeyEngine a little more.</p>

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<h1>It’s been a long time, isn’t it?</h1>
<p>So it’s been a pretty damn long time since my last post (about 3 months .. I think ? ), so I decided to post one now.</p>
<p>Yeah I admit I’ve kind of partially forgotten this blog meantime, I promised myself I will try to get something to remind me every week or so from now on to post a blog post so everything gets to be in my blog and nothing gets forgotten.</p>
<p>So, let’s rewind a little and think what has happened meanwhile, shall we? So Arkhados is still in the makes (see <a href="http://wlinna.wordpress.com/">Dnyarri’s blog</a> for more information on Arkhados), and I’m still making heroes for it (see <a href="http://allexit.x10.mx/">my page</a> for the hero designs), but the rate at whitch I’m putting new heroes on the battlefield is slowing (because making of a hero takes quite a long time and I wait until some heroes are finished before designing new ones), meanwhile I can gather some inspiration on some new ones.</p>
<p>So for Red West, I’m discontinuing the actual project and I’ve begun a while ago another text-based RPG game, this game is called the Solid Kingdom. So Solid Kingdom is going to be very much bigger than Red West was going to be, for first Solid Kingdom will be semi-graphical, so there is map drawn and you can adventure in it etc, very much like in Dungeon Crawl Stone Soup (the game that inspired me to start making this one). Solid Kingdom will also have Hotkey -system in it so you don’t be have to be writing everything you do. Solid Kingdom will also have multicolored terminal-output so text can be other than white and background can be other than black. Solid Kingdom will also have a very high amout of races and classes to be able to play with and is aiming at VERY high moddability. Here is a short list of races that will be implemented in Solid Kingdom;</p>
<ul>
<li>Human, a humanoid race that almost every other humanoid race is based on</li>
<li>Dwarves, human-like smaller race witch is usually very intelligent</li>
<li>Dimril, dwarf race with the tusks and regeneration of a Troll</li>
<li>Imperial Elf, an elf race with a lot better protection in their nature, their skin shine a bit.</li>
<li>Elf, a seperated race of Glarik</li>
<li>Glarik, the original Elf race, only race to be able to smith White Steel</li>
<li>Angerin., practically Angels, very much like Human but they have wings</li>
</ul>
<p>Please note this is a very small list of the races to be implemented.
So Solid Kindom is going to be a Multiplayer (or Singleplayer) Open World turn-based RPG (kind of a hack n’ slash). Solid Kingdom is licenced with GPLv3. You can find <a href="https://github.com/Allexit/Solid-Kingdom">Solid Kingdom’s Github here</a>. Solid Kingdom is completely programmed in Java and for it’s multicolor output, and hotkey-system and partially for GUI an map drawing it uses <a href="https://code.google.com/p/lanterna/">Lanterna</a> (a Java “terminal” library that allows all these things to be done).</p>
<p>Another project I’ve been working on with another friend of mine (commonly known as Firefortcut), is an Open Source handheld console that works on Raspberry Pi type-B circuit. The toughest part of it is actually (surprisingly) the shell of the console. after the future of the console is looking better I’m going to start working on a user interface for the console, and after that another game for the console (called Shadows of Karatsu, I already started working on it but not very focused on it, I will talk about it later). If the console gets enough fame and some name we can probably start making bit more of them and a good estimated price for the actual console is about 100-150€ (135-200 US$), the price gathers from the actual Pi, screen, buttons and the shell material and some tip for us. The Licence of the user interface is still in concideration weather it’s going to be completely free or what? The compressed version of the user interface most likely will be free.</p>
<p>As for Shadows of Karatsu, it’s going to be a pretty generig jRPG game that is going to be very LPC (Liberated Pixel Cup) styled (see http://lpc.opengameart.org/) in graphic and is going to be programmed in java, it uses <a href="http://libgdx.badlogicgames.com/">LibGDX</a> for it’s 2D game engine. It’s at very early stage and isn’t even working correctly atm. so you can expect a very long time before seeing something from it (and not even pushed to github yet, sorry). There’s nothing else really to say about it else than it’s going to be published with GPLv3 licence too.</p>

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<h1>‘Much’ going on</h1>
<p>Okay so.. I haven’t posted anything here for a while and kind of forgotten (damn), so I remembered now and decided it’s time to post another of these fabulous posts. There’s ‘much’ been going on lately and I’ve had a quite projects, for example, Dnyarri, a friend of mine, is creating a BLC -like MOBA game called Arkhados, he has a <a href="http://wlinna.wordpress.com/">blog of his own</a> and you can see Arkhados’ process and progress from there.</p>
<p>So as I said Arkhados is a BLC (Bloodline Champions) -like MOBA game, for others, who are not familiar with BLC, it’s a MOBA game where in beginning of the match players select their bloodlines to play with. When the match starts there is a ‘smallish’ map where two teams fight eachother (1v1 to 5v5) and when the other team manages to kill other players of the opposite team, they win. You require x amount of wins to win the match, it is determined in rules and options.</p>
<p>Arkhados is much like that but at the moment there is only 3 rounds and basically ‘nobody wins’, also there is no teams (yet) and there will be multiple gamemodes, the only one and the current is deathmatch but for an example. there will be team deathmatch etc. later on in the game. Why I’m telling this is because I (at least) see myself as one of the biggest factors in the game, like I’m creating the heroes/champions (whatever they are really) and when we get to the certain point I’ll be making most of the maps too. Of course Dnyarri has power over the heroes since he’s making the game.</p>
<p>I’ve also coded and put up a <a href="http://allexit.x10.mx/">website for the designs</a> and there you can find all of the currently designed characters, characters that are ready for the game, characters that need polish and characters that has been declined by either me later on or Dnyarri, most likely I will not be adding any concepts of heroes there but I will be creating another page for them later. The attributions of the page are not yet added and I’m awfully sorry about it, I’ll be adding it tomorrow or the day after tomorrow, guranteed.</p>
<p>Also I have ‘cancelled’ the Red West project and continued with my old projects whitch can help the next textbased RPG I’m going to make, I’ll be providing links to their git repositerys too, so I’m making a textbased game-engine whitch includes everything a textbased game could need to get started. I haven’t uploaded it to git yet but I’m also making an <a href="https://github.com/Allexit/rpg-toolkit">rpg-toolkit</a>, it’s compactible with textbased RPG:s, 2D and 3D RPG:s, and everything else in between. It’s supposed to handle much of the basic RPG elements, such as basic vendors, normal character, weapons, inventory, equipment, buffs and spells etc. The RPG-toolkit doesn’t really have a name of it’s own, at least yet, it just is, mostly to be an ‘community’ project. Also please note that the rpg-toolkit is in a very early stage and not ready for heavy criticism, so please if you look at it, look at it in a light perspective and be free to contribute with patches and suggestions.</p>
<p>For the Tower Defence I was supposed to make with JMonkeyEngine is looking pretty bad, I haven’t worked on it for quite a while (QUITE) and I’m feeling I should probably start the project all over again if I wanted it to happen. There are too much flaws in it.</p>
<p>But mosly I’ve been slacking off and not getting any work done, althrough I’ve had pretty rough days lately, it doesn’t still explain why I haven’t done anything but played <a href="http://xonotic.org/">Xonotic</a>. Xonotic is pretty awesome btw, I recommen you checking it out, it’s a FOSS game created on DarkPlaces -engine, whitch is based on Quake Engine.Anyways I hope I’ll get more active now and remember to post more on this blog.</p>

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<h1>January update</h1>
<p>so, I kinda forgot about the thing where I was supposed to post a post every week, but once every month is good too.. right …? Yeah I admit I screwed up, but I’ll make it up to you, I started to learn <a href="http://jmonkeyengine.org">jMonkeyEngine</a> in the side of doing Solid Kingdom (still thinking another name for it), wishing I could once make a 3D game (lol).</p>
<p>I have this one idea I’m going to make with jME, but I’ll keep it a secret, I’ll tell you guys if it catches on, but it’s supposed to be release ready about 1.4.14 (see already why?), but it can strech up to August, since that’s when the <a href="http://www.assembly.org/">Summer Assembly</a> starts. I’ll be sending the game to the game dev comp this year, hoping for some attention and just for fun.</p>
<hr>
<p>Later lookback on the post;</p>
<p>This post is one of the draft posts I started to make in this time, but somehow got lost, I finally found one. This wa ssupposed to be posted 12.1.2014, but anyways this project I’m talking about here has been like priority #2 for quite a long time now, I haven’t forgotten it but I rather work on Solid Kingdom than this.</p>

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<h1>Updates updates..</h1>
<p>So, no I didn’t forget about the blog meantime the last update I made, instead I actually posted one or two updates but I’m not really sure why, they got removed and I didn’t obviously have a backup on them. now I’m just going to cover all I’ve updated so in them and a bit more.</p>
<p>So looking at Solid Kingdom, my newest project (see previous post where I tell more about it), it’s went on pretty well, I DO have it on github, in fact <a href="https://github.com/Allexit/Solid-Kingdom">this</a> is it’s github repositery, but I haven’t pushed updates into github for quite a long time actually, I’m very sorry about that, it might look like the project’s frozen but it’s actually running further than almost any of my projects has before. I still don’t have any real gameplay on the actual game (I’m currently working on it), but instead I’ve been working on huge things behind the scenes and I think this game is going to be so good and so much fun to make. I’m now going to try list all the things I’ve done after I stopped using github; I’ve added a layer system (easier to add messages and other things that overlap eachother). I’ve also added some kind of message box system, that’s not in real use yet but will be as soon as I get on the real gameplay. I’ve now recently added an Action/ActionHandler system, this just makes it easier for me to first work on singleplayer side of the game and later implement multiplayer, I’m not going to explain here with all the technical information on how it works, but in a nutshell, when you try to do anything it sends an action to the ActionHandler, whitch decides on what to do with it, after that it either processes the action itself or sends it to server to be processed (depends on if you’re playing multiplayer or singleplayer). I’ve also added tonnes of little things and bigger things too that I can’t quite recall at the moment</p>
<p>Now the reason I’ve kind of stopped using github, is because it really makes my project harder to handle for me. Git is a nice and easy version control, but I can’t use it very well, for example if I rename a file, it does not remove the old file from the repo nor rename it, just adds the renamed file as a new one. If I’m ever going to return to using Github with Solid Kingdom, I’m most likely going to make a full wipe and re-push everything. Now I’m not saying I’m stopping to use github on other projects, it works well in any other way and I’m very pleased with it, I’m just going to have to learn more how to use it and look back on it later.</p>
<p>On the story side of the Solid Kingdom, I haven’t really decided much, I’ve decided that I’m going to make some kind of “personal” wiki for the story and addthe story piece-by-piece there, not writing books or anything, but instead just listing out events, characters etc. from the story.</p>
<p>As some of you may have also noticed I always publish my working under “Smoldering Planet”, and as some of you might know, Smoldering Planet is my game-making studio. Obviously it’s not like a real company with oriented people doing stuff for me, but once in a while I might ask a friend to join me on a project, and we publish the work under the studio, and list our names in the credits. Anyways, Smoldering Planet has been going now for about 4 to 5 years, or maby even longer. Yes Smoldering Planet is VERY old, but it’s changed it’s name very many times for a number of reasons. Mostly because I just later thought the name is incredibly stupid. Smoldering Planet was first called “Lol Gamer Studios” (yes I’m serious), it was like that for about a year or so, then it changed to “Forming Time Studios” (yes, I’m not kidding). It stayed like that for about 2 years or so, when I changed to “OverCore”, I really never used the name, like it was there, but I never made a big thing about it. I don’t think I ever even made a website for it. Anyways, after that I finally changed to Smoldering Planet, I’m not very sure how long I’ve been with the name, but I think it’s been aroud a year. After all this time I’ve finally come up with a name I really like; Saltosion Entertainment or shortly just Saltosion. Yes I’m changing the name again, not very sure when, but probably as soon as I get Saltosion’s new page up and running, I allready have a logo for it too.</p>
<p>Looking on this blog, I really like this blog and I’m probably going to post here again in a week or two, so be prepared. I’m also hoping I’d see more visitors in this blog, not that I really like being famous or anything, but instead I’d like to share my stories with the whole world and I want everyone to know them, and maeby even help me on some situations. If you’d be so kind, tell your friends about me.</p>

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@ -0,0 +1,5 @@
<h1>Renovated grand opening</h1>
<p>Hello, so as many of you probably know, I haven’t posted in a remarkably long time. I can not answer your fervent question, weather it’s about to change or not, but I’ve decided to take a complete new angle on this blog.</p>
<p>Now this blog is not just for my projects and programming stuff, but it’s for pretty much anything that I think of. Imagine twitter, but longer.</p>
<p>I’ll now start posting again some updates about a few projects I might have etc. but along with that I’ll be posting some rantings that might be philosophical, of public opinion, or some random criticism.</p>
<p>Till’ we meet again, have a jolly gay day.</p>

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<h1>The matrix is (uncertainly) real!</h1>
<p>So I was thinking the other day about humanity and our society. I then started thinking about the future of humanity, what kind of life would be “good life” for people in the future, and what kind of society could provide good life for everyone?</p>
<p>Well defining good life obviously differs for subject to subject, so general good life doesn’t exactly exist. This only means that people must be offered differing things depending on their desires, to give good life to them. A good place to start is obviously communism. In a perfect marxist communist society everyone gets equally what they need, and there is no money whatsoever. This though leads to a society where you would <strong>need</strong> to define a global good life, that people should live on, which wouldn’t work as intended as earlier noted, there can be no global good life. And because in communism there is no money, stuff is shared equally, people get stuff they don’t want and not enough stuff they want, so it’s not really optimal.</p>
<p>Now another path we could go, what if everyone has the equal amount of money, this would mean that anyone could just buy what they want, and everyone has the equal opportunity to have anything. This is a good model of a society working technically, but the greater questions come in hand, who would collect and more importantly distribute the money? Who would keep track of the money? Would money actually be necessary even in a society like this? If everyone just gets money, why would anyone do any work to get money or produce the goods to sell? So this model doesn’t quite fit for what we’re looking for either.</p>
<p>So let’s get really <strong>sci-fi</strong>, and imagine there can be a society where there are thousands of robots per every person, and they basically do everything for us, treat us, feed us and entertain us. This would be really handy, and probably a great model, but who would create the first robots? Secondly what could prevent the robots from becoming <strong>overlords</strong>, and <em>enslaving humanity</em>? And even thirdly could we have more efficient choices that provide good life for people with this kind of technology?</p>
<p>Then I started thinking, to provide to a single person anything he could desire, we should invent a true <em>virtual reality</em>, in which people can do and create whatever they desire, after the technology is sufficient enough, they wouldn’t be too expensive to create, and everyone could have their own “private reality” they live in. But hold on, we’re getting into some real matrix shit over here. Maybe the virtual reality would just be a counterpart of our reality, in where someone could just decide anything s/he wants, and it would happen (et cetera). So would that mean that everyone who lives there (exists there in general) are in the matrix? Yes. How can we tell we aren’t already in virtual reality like this? We most likely can’t. So when we invent these virtual reality machines, we end the circle, and nobody again knows, that they live in a virtual reality. This loop repeats infinitely, until someone were to realize they live in the virtual reality, and manage to actually escape it.</p>
<p>The only problem is, how can you really tell if you’re on the top level matrix or not?</p>
<p>This has been a jolly philosophical rant session. Thank you for reading. <em><insert an equal communist smily here></em></p>

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<div class="cont">

24
css/main.css
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@ -46,7 +46,9 @@ body, html {
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<script type="text/javascript" src="/js/main.js"></script>
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<body onload="main('games')">
<div class="cont">

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index.html
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@ -3,7 +3,11 @@
<link rel="stylesheet" href="/css/main.css">
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<script type="text/javascript" src="/js/main.js"></script>
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<body onload="main('about')">
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js/main.js
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@ -13,7 +13,15 @@ function main(page) {
search = search.slice(1, -1);
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if (parts[0] == "id") {
setBlogText(parts[1] + ".html", function () { });
var timestamp = void 0;
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timestamp = new Date(window.blogpostData[i].time).toUTCString();
}
}
setBlogText(parts[1] + ".html", timestamp);
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}
}
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window.history.pushState(target, target, targetPg + "/");
document.getElementsByClassName("stuffarea")[0].scrollTop = 0;
slideOpacity(function () {
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callback();
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document.getElementById("blogtext").appendChild(timestamp);
}
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scss/main.scss
View File

@ -69,6 +69,8 @@ body, html {
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padding-right: 5%;
margin-bottom: 10%;
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color: $regular;
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color: $regular;
}
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4
src/template.html
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@ -3,7 +3,11 @@
<link rel="stylesheet" href="/css/main.css">
<script type="text/javascript" src="/blogposts/blogposts.json"></script>
<script type="text/javascript" src="/js/main.js"></script>
<meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1">
<meta charset="utf-8">
<title>Teascade | $page$</title>
</head>
<body onload="main('$page$')">
<div class="cont">

30
ts/main.ts
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@ -26,7 +26,16 @@ function main(page: string) {
search = search.slice(1, -1);
let parts = search.split("=");
if (parts[0] == "id") {
setBlogText(parts[1] + ".html", () => {});
let timestamp: string;
for (let i in window.blogpostData) {
console.log(window.blogpostData[i].source);
console.log(search + ".html");
if (window.blogpostData[i].source == parts[1] + ".html") {
timestamp = new Date(window.blogpostData[i].time).toUTCString();
}
}
setBlogText(parts[1] + ".html", timestamp);
}
}
}
@ -44,6 +53,9 @@ function openPage(page: string, new_url: string = null) {
if (target == "about") { target = ""; targetPg = ""; };
window.history.pushState(target, target, `${targetPg}/`);
document.getElementsByClassName("stuffarea")[0].scrollTop = 0;
slideOpacity(() => {
}, 1.5);
@ -78,20 +90,26 @@ function addBlogposts() {
div.appendChild(title);
setBlogText(val.source, () => {
title.onclick = () => openPage("blogtext", "blogtext?id=" + val.source.slice(0, -5));
})
title.onclick = () => {
openPage("blogtext", "blogtext?id=" + val.source.slice(0, -5));
setBlogText(val.source, new Date(val.time).toUTCString());
};
})
}
function setBlogText(source: string, callback: () => void) {
function setBlogText(source: string, time: string) {
let xmlhttp = new XMLHttpRequest();
xmlhttp.onreadystatechange = () => {
if (xmlhttp.readyState == XMLHttpRequest.DONE) {
if (xmlhttp.status == 200) {
document.getElementById("blogtext").innerHTML = xmlhttp.responseText;
callback();
let timestamp = document.createElement("p");
timestamp.className += "timestamp";
timestamp.innerHTML = time;
document.getElementById("blogtext").appendChild(timestamp);
}
}
}